Jordan's Jungle Plan

Star magazine (and aren't they shy, they try to hide their own logo) tell us that Jordan going into the jungle was a plan to win Peter Andre back.

I don't work for Relate or anything, but if you want to entice a man, sucking on a kangaroo penis isn't the best move. Getting covered in cockroaches and crocodile crap doesn't make you more attractive.

You never overhear some guy saying, "I wasn't really sure if she was the one, but when I saw her chewing on a bollock..."

You get the idea.


P.S. At least you know I don't spend more than 90p researching this crap.

• Dated Thursday, November 26, 2009